My thoughts on "Combray" by Marcel Proust

 I noticed that in "Combray" by Marcel Proust there is a lot of descriptive language used. This leads me to the find the text a bit confusing and hard to read. For the first few pages it was very difficult for me to piece together a storyline or just to figure out what was happening in general. The text seemed to show a lot of very deep thinking and perspective from the narrator when it comes to life and the other people that are in his life and family. The way that the narrator speaks about relying on a goodnight kiss from his mother in order to calm his anxiety so that he can sleep seems like something that is extremely important to him and something that he can not go without. The narrator seems to be very reliant on his mother and not being able to receive a goodnight kiss from his mother will cause his anxiety to rise and he would not be able to sleep. The attention to detail and the focus on the need for the attention from his mother shows that he may be struggling with a separation anxiety from her or potentially other mental health issues or disorders. 


My question is: "What do we think may have led to the narrator's need to be strongly connected to his mother?


Another thing in the text that has led me to be confused, is when the narrator believes that his father would be mad at him for wanting this attention or love from his mother. This leads me to question whether the father would be upset at the narrator due to being too old to be needing his mother or if it is something based on gender. The father might think that because he is a male he needs to toughen up and not act upset or show emotions. The narrator is also very informed on the way the other family members act towards and think about M. Swann. He notices their infatuation with him and how he is a known person in society. The narrator sees the way that his family members had prepared for their meal with M. Swann. He noticed how they put a lot of a care into how they acted around him and how they talked about him and questioned if they were polite enough after M. Swann had left their home. This shows that M. Swann holds significance to the family as well as the narrator. I am confused on how this relates to the narrator and his situation. I am led to thinking that this impacts the narrator in a way that makes hm feel insecure of attention from his family members, predominantly his mother. 

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